Sugar Packets

So, a lot has changed in 8 days. I can't tell you how many times I had the intention of sitting down to update this blog on how Roy was doing, or some of the amazing blessings God gave the family, or even some of the sadder moments of the past few days. But, I just never did. Time passed so quickly that it all seemed like a blur, but I can also say at the time, it was as slow as molasses. Kind of crazy I can compare the same time frame in such opposite terms. But, I can also say in conflicting terms that I cannot remember my heart being so broken, yet so full at the same time, either. You know, God is kind of funny like that. I learned a long time ago that God was not the author of pain, but the author of happiness, joy, and celebration. So, somewhere in the sorrow, God allows us to see the amazing outcome of what He so richly blessed. Maybe that is His little "bonus plan". He doesn't stop the hurt, but He sure coats it with some sweetness in a cool little sugar packet to counteract the sour. So, here it goes... our past 8 days in a nutshell...
or sugar packets...

After Hospice was called in, a head nurse, or charge nurse that oversees all the nurses that shift work through the days and nights presented himself. Sugar packet #1: Justin. Long story short: Justin realized he knew Big Roy. Turns out that when Justin was 5 years old, his daddy passed away leaving both his mamma and him without a man in the house. However, Justin's dad had this really neat boss that took the time to make sure that he and his mom had food on the table, support, and all around care. You know who that man was over 20 years ago? Yup. Roy Raley. Justin was so amazed that he was now able to take care of the man that took the time to make sure his family was okay in a time of deep need. God is good, all the time.

Roy's rapid decline startled all of us, including the nurses and doctors. Just two days before Roy became somewhat incoherent, a group of men came to see Roy. All of these men used to work for him at one point or another at Publix. Some of these guys were part of the "Raley's Raiders". They sat on the floor and in chairs around Roy as Sheila watched a constant smile on her husband's face as these men laughed, told stories, and shared "life" with their one-time boss and friend. After school, I came over and Roy couldn't wait to tell me all about it. His comment to me: "It was a good day." Sugar Packet #2.

Sugar Packet #3... Labor Day. Man, did yesterday stink. It started off at 5:30 in the morning when the phone rang and Jack jumped out of bed to rush to his Dad's side. I followed quickly behind. It was a long day. One that was emotionally draining, tearful, and all around sad. So why was it a "sugar packet" day? It was Labor Day, a holiday. ALL of his family was gathered around him in his last full day. It happened only because no one had to be at work, no one had places to be, and it was all because God blessed us with a holiday. I don't really believe in coincidences. God is in all the details...even Labor Day.

So, all the sweetness made today not so sour. Roy passed away in his sleep at 3 in the morning on September 8, 2009. 33 days after his diagnosis, Roy left in quiet dignity.

Oh, and one last sugar packet: ALL of you. I can honestly say that I never realized how truly blessed I was with all of my friends and family. Every one's outpouring of love and support has been nearly overwhelming. I never would have imagined that so many of you would be willing to send cards to someone you never met, or call and offer to mow the yard, make food, take the kids, I could go on and on. I am blessed. Bottom line. What a sugar packet for me.

Roy Lee Raley Sr., 71 of Eustis passed away at his home on Tuesday September 8, 2009. He was born in Water Valley Mississippi and moved here from Altamonte Springs in 1992. Mr. Raley retired as a District Manager for Publix Supermarkets after 37 ½ years of service. He was Baptist. He is survived by his wife Sheila, his children Roy Lee Raley Jr. (Christine) of Oviedo, Sheryl Raley DeTellis (Timothy) of Altamonte Springs and Jack Raley (Kelly) of Eustis, his grandchildren Vincent Raley, Richelle Raley, Colby Raley, Morgan Raley, Luc DeTellis and Kate DeTellis, his brother James Raley (Juanita) of Byhalia, Mississippi and sister Flora Mae Mills of Water Valley, Mississippi. Visitation will be held in the Hamlin & Hilbish Chapel on Saturday, September 12, from 10 AM until Noon, Funeral Services will be held in the First Baptist Church of Eustis at 3 PM Sunday, September 13, with Pastor Tim Grosshans officiating. Final resting place will be Greenwood Cemetery, Eustis. The family requests those desiring direct memorials to Cornerstone Hospice, 2445 Lane Park Road Tavares, 32778